The Meaning of A Sober Christmas | One Addict Shares His Story!
Christmas is a special time of the year in my family. We all come together, cousins, aunts, and uncles, all of the extended family converge at my grandmother’s house for the festivities. As a young boy growing up, this time of year held a lot of significance; getting to see my family and catching up on their lives, seeing my grandmother and spending some quality time with her in the kitchen, and of course opening the presents on Christmas morning with the whole family. My last few Christmas’s started to dissolve those sentiments as I got focused more and more on when my next drink would be up until Christmas 2014 when I spent all of Christmas eve waiting for the family to go to sleep so I could raid my grandmother’s liquor cabinet. Come Christmas morning, I woke up in a stupor to my mother shaking me and trying to wake me up before the rest of the family came downstairs. I had a vague recollection of what had happened the night before and did not want to deal with family or presents, I just wanted a quiet place with a beer and a pillow. My mother was not having it, though, and I had to sit through the morning ritual in a fog. Without going into too much detail, it was one of the most miserable days of my life because of all of the hurt I caused my family during that most special family tradition.
Christmas 2015 was my first sober holiday in over a decade and even though I had but 2 months sober and was not too happy about being here, I was still able to enjoy the holiday spirit and joy. This year is a whole different experience, though, and it is something that I will never forget. I am looking forward to the inevitable Christmas cleaning because of the brotherly love that is tangible in the air; I am looking forward to the never ending Christmas music that I can hear while writing this; and most of all, I am looking forward to being able to give my mother the Christmas that she remembers from my childhood.
To me, the meaning of Christmas has changed a lot, from a day to get a bunch of free stuff to a time to spend with people I care about like the guys in the house, with a special significance for my family. This is the first Christmas that my grandmother is not going to be around for and though we are going to miss her, I have the opportunity to do for my mom what my grandmother did for her; create a memorable Christmas tradition that will last generations.