19 Feb Fun in Sobriety
When I got sober I did not know how to genuinely be happy and have a good time. I thought that the rest of my life was going to be boring if I made the decision to make sobriety my lifestyle. The only fun that I knew before sober living house was using drugs and alcohol. I used to see people that were entertained by going to the movies, going bowling, going to amusement and water parks, but I didn’t see the point in doing those things unless I was drunk or high.
To myself my thinking seemed rational and I did not understand how other people could get enjoyment out of those kinds of activities. Through drugs and alcohol I tried to chase any possible way to have fun…and it was fun at first…but eventually I took it to a whole new level and became emotionally immature and miserable.
I saw all of the guys in the sober living house who had some time and I was baffled by how much fun they had on a daily basis even when they had a busy day. The lifestyle that they were living got more and more attractive to me, but I was discouraged that I didn’t have what they had and it didn’t seem obtainable. Even when we would go out to do things I wouldn’t be able to enjoy myself on the grounds that I was so fearful of what other people thought of me and that constantly made me uncomfortable. I would think to myself on a daily basis, “I am too young to stay sober because I still want to party and use drugs and alcohol.” For a while I was in a battle between not wanting to go back to the life I had and the harm and the pain I had caused others – but wanting the party to keep going because I still wanted to have more fun.
So what I began to do was ask questions. I asked the guys in the sober living house how they got to that point where sobriety was more fun that drugs and alcohol. I started to grasp an understanding that it was going to take me doing a lot of work on myself. But I was up for the challenge because I was sick and tired of the way that I felt. After a few months of doing what was asked of me I noticed a complete one eighty in the way that I felt and my perspective on sobriety. I caught myself laughing and having a good time throughout my day, and realized that I was having genuine fun with friends that I never could’ve imagined having. I could enjoy myself because I wasn’t so consumed in others thoughts and views about me.
This is the lifestyle that I am sure that I want and I will do everything it takes to keep it. Being young in sobriety there is no doubt that I have to have fun; if I didn’t then there would be no point. Since I was young I had always wanted to travel and do amazing things, but when I began to use drugs and alcohol those goals became fantasy. Today I know I will be able to do all of those things because I’m no longer trapped in my addiction. It is important to have fun in sobriety because I got sober, happy and free and not miserable. If I isolate and don’t do things with my friends I begin to get bored, and when I am bored the story I tell myself is that the only way to have fun is to use drugs and alcohol. Today I have more fun than I ever did when I was active in my addiction and the drastic change is that it is genuine fun.