A Father Comes to Terms With His Son’s Addiction

I have three sons all in their 20’s, all pretty good kids, all pretty normal except one who suffers from a not so rare disease…. Drug Addiction.  So how did I come to accept the fact that I would no longer be able to drink a beer with my son at a baseball game, or go shoot a game of pool and grab a drink with him?  It’s an unselfish realization that I had that it’s not about me, and it wasn’t about my son drinking a beer with me, it was more about him changing his life and doing something meaningful and different. It was bigger than just drinking a beer or not drinking a beer, it was a better understanding that he was going through this process and he had a lifelong illness. It wasn’t a temporary thing, but a lifelong disease.  The truth is I have my son back and in a better way than I ever could have imagined. He’s a changed man, a humbled person and with a better vision of who he is and the person he’s become.

Bottom line is my son is focused on the bigger picture, and my job as a father and a friend has changed dramatically. I am not to judge or put a guilt trip on him, but to let him further develop the path he’s on of sobriety and being of service to other addicts in need. Because of the group at New Life House and the management team my son is alive, he’s sober, and most importantly he’s a nice young man who is giving back. After 16 ½ months of being sober he has finished his 12th step and a has a better understanding of how to treat others and most importantly himself As the tears roll down my face these days, they’re tears of joy, and I’m grateful!



verified by Psychology Today

2 Comments
  • Debbie O-A
    Posted at 10:57h, 22 May Reply

    Amen!

  • Mardi
    Posted at 16:42h, 22 May Reply

    Well said. Like you, we too well-up with tears: tears of gratitude and happiness! A mere 14 months ago, our tears were for quite different reasons. Thank you New Life House for helping our son find sobriety through accountability and responsibility and service.

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